Childless at Christmas again

We don't get to wrap presents for our child. We don't get to make cookies with our child. We don't get to tell our child to go to bed so Santa can stop at our house. We don't get woken up by excited little voices at 6am on Christmas day.

It's just the two of us.

This year should have been different. This week we should have a newborn in our arms. We should have the nursery done and dirty diapers in the trash. I should have tired eyes and spit up on my shirt.

But instead, we have an angel in the sky. And pain in our hearts.