Monday, April 17, 2017

Dylan's birth story

One week ago we had a baby. After all these years of us waiting and doing everything we could to have a baby, we had our perfect little guy.

On Sunday, April 9th at 9pm we checked into the hospital. We had a planned induction. I was 3.5cm dilated already, so they started me on a low dose induction med through my IV and told me to get some sleep. I was too excited and nervous to get much sleep that night, I was so ready to meet my baby. The next morning, I was 5cm dilated so they began to up the meds. I had high blood pressure so they gave me a med to lower it. A few hours later I was fully dilated. Pushing began! I received an epidural for the pain. I pushed and pushed.

After 3 hours of this, my Dr said that he thinks this is a big baby and I had a narrow pelvic bone. He said I could keep pushing or move onto a c-section. If you asked me what I did not want to happen before this day, I would have told you a c-section. I wanted to be able to be there and hold my baby immediately after having him, I knew having a c-section would change that. But I knew I could not push any longer especially when there is a big possibility that it wouldn't change anything and I would still need a c-section later.

I received a second epidural in preparation for the c-section. It did not take. My blood pressure dropped way too low and I needed oxygen. My husband was worried I wasn't breathing. The oxygen helped and I was stable. They wheeled me into the operating room and my husband couldn't come with right away while they prepped me.

Then I received a spinal which numbed me from the neck down. I was a little out of it and was just asking where my husband was. Finally he was able to join me and I asked him if everything was going to be okay. He assured me it would be okay.

Then I heard a cry. Oh I heard the perfect little cry. This is the best sound I will ever hear in my entire life.

My husband was with him while the nurse cleaned him off and then they brought him over to me.

I got to see him for a minute before my husband and the nurse took him to weigh/measure him. My surgery had to be finished up before I could go get a better look at my baby. It was probably the longest 30 or so minutes of my life laying there waiting to go be with my husband and our new baby.

Dylan Robert Baxter was born on April 10th, 2017 at 3:37pm. He was 8 lbs 10 oz, 21 inches long, and had a 14.5 inch head! He is perfect. We are in love.

His birth isn't what I imagined. But in the end all I wanted was a healthy baby. If I got asked about his birth day, I will recall his cry, his luscious dark hair, my husband with his arms wrapped around him, and then feeling my baby laying on my chest.

Thursday, April 6, 2017

The month of April

April has become a hard month for me over these past years.

On this day, I have been pregnant 3 out of the last 4 years. Finally here I am almost 39 weeks pregnant and baby boy will be here soon. I have waited to hold our baby for so long and I cannot believe I will get to in 4-5 days.

And I just want to say:

I love you
I love you
I love you
my baby.

Sunday, March 26, 2017

Before you arrive

Baby Dylan,

As I sit here 37 weeks pregnant with you pushing up on my belly, I wanted to write to you before you arrive into the world. I dream of you all day and can only imagine how our life will change once you are here. I can only imagine seeing your face for the first time, hearing you cry, holding you close to me, kissing your cheeks, and being able to say this is my son. This is so overwhelming for me because for a really long time I did not know if you would be real for us.

We have wanted you for so long and now it's coming true. You will be here in the next 20 days hopefully. I am counting the days because the day you arrive will be the day my heart is full. To know you are half me and half your daddy is the greatest thing I could ever ask for.

Even though I wish I could fast forward to meeting you, I am still soaking in the moments when I feel you move inside my belly. Being your mom and carrying you has been my favorite thing in my entire life. And I know that feeling will grow even stronger once you are here with us.

We will see you soon. I will be the crying woman who holds you tight and won't ever want to let go.

I love you
I love you
I love you


Wednesday, February 8, 2017

Baby boy coming soon..

Last July we transferred 2 perfect embryos.

It's almost 7 months later now and we are 31 weeks pregnant with our baby boy.

Wow I know. A lot has changed. Let's go back for a second.

In June I started medication to get my new cycle to start. Once I did that I would be able to start prepping my body for our embryo transfer. I started injections and saw the specialist to make sure everything was looking good. Everything was going great! On July 28th, my husband and I went in to the doctor's office. We were ready to bring our embryos home with us. We watched as the Dr took a vial that contained 2 embryos and put them into my uterus. It is amazing to think that in that moment our baby could be snuggling in and making this their home for 9 months!

I felt pregnant. Only a few days after transfer I took a pregnancy test and sure enough it was positive already! That was fast! A week later I did blood work to confirm and my level was already high. And it got higher and higher as time went on. We thought both embryos took and we were going to have twins!

We went in for an early ultrasound and saw one sac. It was too early to see much. We would have to wait a few weeks to see our baby.

Around 6-7 weeks pregnant, I started bleeding. I had been here before and I knew it was our baby. We were losing another baby. How could this happen to us again and again?

At 8 weeks pregnant, my husband and I went into my new obgyn and told him what was going on. He let us do an ultrasound immediately that day. We didn't know what to expect. I didn't know if it would be bad news again. Then we saw our baby. We saw a little gummy bear inside his sac. The Dr then saw an empty smaller sac. He wasn't sure what to think about this second smaller sac, we would have to wait and see.

Our lil guy grew inside his sac and everything looked good! Meanwhile the second sac got smaller and smaller, it took weeks but then it was gone completely. The bleeding I had weeks ago was us losing our baby's twin.

Since then this pregnancy has been pretty wonderful. We found out we are having a boy! He is looking perfect and we cannot wait to hold him. He should arrive in 7-9 weeks! Can you believe that?

We are having a baby. For real this time.

Monday, May 23, 2016

The IVF journey

On March 15th, I had my egg retrieval! It was a very exciting day and I had 34 eggs collected! Holy cow, that is a lot! That was a huge success and we were very happy.

On March 20th, we found out we made 10 great looking embryos. We transferred 1 into my uterus and froze the other 9.

Because I had so many eggs, I did develop a slight case of overstimulation. I gained about 10 lbs within 4 days. I started a high sodium diet to help with this. I had a huge belly from the overstimming. That took about a week to go down.

Then we just had to wait. We had positive pregnancy tests at home and positive blood tests at the drs office. My HCG level kept rising and all was looking good.

Then at 6 weeks pregnant I started bleeding. So we went into the dr's office and saw our baby's sac and fetal pole. All looked great!

A week later, we went back for another ultrasound. Our baby was gone. We lost him/her. We were devastated. We have now lost 2 babies exactly 2 years apart. It's not right. We want to be parents!

Now it is a month later. We had our 9 frozen embryos genetically tested. 8 are perfectly normal embryos and look amazing. The 9th embryo was abnormal and had down syndrome.

We are just on a break right now before we do another embryo transfer later this year. We are just hoping that since we had the embryos genetically tested our next pregnancy will be a healthy long one.

Friday, March 4, 2016

Treatment Update

So here is what's been going on with treatment. I had the hysteroscopy to determine once and for all what my uterus is shaped like. He determined (like the first specialist) that I have an arcuate uterus and not a septum. This is good news. I don't require surgery. So we are a go for IVF in March.

My bloodwork showed I have high prolactin. My specialist started me on a new medication and he wanted me to go in for an MRI of my pituitary gland. I had it done and results came back clear. I am good.

My husband had genetic testing and he is not a carrier of the gene I am a carrier of so we are happy.

We ordered all of our meds! Over $4k later, we have all the meds ready to go for when we need them. We went to the meds injections training.

So now I have done 10 days of injections already. We start adding in more meds to our injection schedule starting tomorrow. These will be the injections that stimulate follicle growth!

Starting next week I will be at the doctor's office about every other day to check my ovaries and see how many follicles are growing. This will be the exciting time. Not sure what to expect since everyone responds differently. We are set for an egg retrieval March 16th. That could change within a day or so. Then 5 days later we will be transferring 2 embryos.

And then we will wait and hope that this works!

Wednesday, January 27, 2016

Our Plan!

Today we met with a third specialist. It went great! I think he will be the one to help us. We made a plan and I am excited for once!

I am starting provera this weekend to induce my cycle. Once that starts, I will be doing all the pre-testing and doing an office hysteroscopy. He is agreeing with the first specialist that my uterus is an arcuate which is a very good thing. My husband will be doing genetic testing and bloodwork. Once all that is complete, we can meet with the specialist again to go over all the results.

We have a plan of IVF in March! Fingers crossed everything goes well and we will be on track for this.

Our 10th marriage anniversary is May 26th. Wouldn't it be the best anniversary gift to be expecting our little one? We have waited so long and it has to be our time!!